What is domestic abuse?
You may be more familiar with the term Domestic Violence. Both of these terms are used to describe any form of abuse against women and children, perpetrated by a partner, an ex-partner, or family member.
Using the term Domestic Violence can be limiting and confusing if people believe it only describes physical acts of violence such as:
- Punching
- Slapping
- Kicking
- Pushing
- Spitting
- Stamping
- Burning
However, the term Domestic Abuse is a more expansive term describing the many ways women and children are victimised and affected.
What the law says
Since the Domestic Abuse Act 2021, domestic abuse has a legal definition in England and Wales. It is abusive behaviour by one person towards another where both are aged 16 or over and are personally connected (for example partners, ex-partners or relatives). It includes physical or sexual abuse, violent or threatening behaviour, controlling or coercive behaviour, economic abuse, and psychological, emotional or other abuse. It can be a single incident or a pattern of behaviour.
The Act also recognises children who see, hear or experience the effects of domestic abuse as victims in their own right.
To help people identify what Domestic Abuse actually is, it can be broken down into categories:
- Physical Abuse
- examples above
- Emotional Abuse, such as:
- name calling
- destroying self-esteem and confidence; making you believe you are worthless
- tracking, controlling movement, timing actions, isolating you from family and friends
- Financial and economic abuse, such as:
- taking control of money; benefits, wages
- claiming monies, benefits, arranging loans/debt without your consent
- asking for receipts
- Sexual Abuse, such as:
- putting you under extreme pressure, bullying you into having sex or to engage in sexual activity, never letting you say NO
- degrading you sexually, making you behave in ways you do not want to, involving other people, leaving you feeling humiliated
- persuading you to have sex in exchange for money or rewards
- only showing affection in order to get what he wants
- Stalking
- following you or members of your family
- hacking/checking your emails, social network sites
- phoning, texting constantly
- making demands so that you have to justify and explain your movements
These categories do help people identify violent and abusive behaviours so that they can understand what domestic abuse is. However, it is vital to remember that all abusive acts have an emotional impact on a victim. Perpetrators of domestic abuse will employ tactics and behaviours intended to frighten, scare their victim, ensuring that they are exerting control and holding the power in the relationship. So, while the perpetrator may threaten and commit physical violence this will be underpinned by their ability to hurt the victim emotionally. The emotional impact of domestic abuse is often described using the term Coercive Control: it is “an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim”. Controlling or coercive behaviour in an intimate or family relationship has been a criminal offence in England and Wales since December 2015.